Never have so few people, with so little talent, been awarded so much praise.

For fucks sake, Its Oscars time again, and if you’re some poor attention-seeking overpaid actor living in luxury in the Hollywood hills, your life just isn’t complete without a stupid little statue and a chance to spout crap come speech-time.

Paltro's Greatest Performance to date?

So give them a round of applause and pity those poor sods who didn’t get a prize but did get a multi-million dollar pay-check for doing two weeks work last year.

Enjoy the Smugboards photo coverage

Some Hollywood wankers enjoy the backstage excitement

An Oscar

Someone bought a snowman as a guest

Birdstrike!

Finally Hollywood's Real Money Men make their grand entrance